Demonessa, ruler of ninth ring of Hell (crumpled_sheets) wrote in catharticsouls,
Demonessa, ruler of ninth ring of Hell

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Creeping Gray
by crumpled_sheets

I hate the edges of gray
that slowly creep in
from the corner of my eyes
i see it
When I am enjoying myself
the memories come intruding in
"What have you done!"
"What have you done!"
I hear my father scream from his grave
It's the nightmares he's having again
of a child of long ago
He'll roll over
and go back to sleep
Sometimes he remembers me
"You stupid little bitch,
I told you,
you wouldn't make it!"
But wait,
I think that is me saying that
I get the voices confused sometimes
I always ignore me though
I push it out
Holding onto a rope
dancing and kicking wildly
trying to forget again
My mother says nothing
In her daydreams
I am like the furniture
I am moveable
I am poseable
and in her dreams
I love her
I am not real to her.
I think i need another obsession
to grab my attention
to keep my doors and
windows locked
against the gray that always slips in
I have to realize
that at my core
I am very weak
I can't get over it
I can't get past it
I have to keep dancing wildly
until I am exhausted
Then I earn the reward
of sleep
There is no end
There is no cure
For the gray that creeps.
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